Gay pirates

Standard (EADGBE)

Verse 1

This rain is too salty

For me to even drink

I'd rather stride the dreaded plank

Than stay another week

But it's you, my love

You're my country, ahoy!

And I'm sick of being beaten

And whipped and lashed to death

I desire one night with no gang rape

But I won't grasp my breath

But it's you, my love

You're my land, ahoy!

And you're my boy

Chorus

Yo ho, Sebastian!

Let's leave far away

Somewhere where the captain won't be mad

Yo ho, Sebastian!

I wanna admire you good

And we deserve much finer than we've had

Verse 2

They say they're gonna kill me

If I look at you once more

They spinned my hammock yesterday

So I'll doze on the floor

I'd be under the sea

But you grip me above

And they put glass in my sandals

So my feet would bleed all day

And they forced me to wear them

Or they said they'd build you pay

I'd be under the sea

But you hold me above

You're the guy I love!

Chorus

Yo ho, Sebastian!

Let's go far away

Somewhere where the captain won't be mad

Yo ho, Sebastian!

I wanna love you good

And we justify much better than we've had

Verse 3

The captain found about us

And ordered them to throw

Us both overboard tonight

Tog

The Problem with “Gay Pirates”

The major issues with the song “Gay Pirates” by Cosmo Jarvis are twofold, somewhat intertwined, and as follows:

1. gratuitous torture porn, and
2. historical inaccuracy.

A quick glance at the lyrics shows us this song really, REALLY wants to tell us all about every single horrible thing Cosmo Jarvis thinks a gay snatch would go through. Not even twenty seconds into the ballad itself, we are explicitly informed that at least one of the gay pirates is gang-raped every single night by the rest of the crew. You’d think that’d be enough torture for one homosexual love ballad, but wait, there’s more!

They are given saltwater to drink (which is essentially a death sentence); beaten, whipped, AND lashed (again, you’d think just one flogging with a cat-o’-nine-tails would complete the trick, but no); and forced to walk in glass-filled sandals, which sounds like a great way to sever a tendon and be rendered permanently lame, if not hit an artery and bleed the fuck out.

Add all that together, and “Gay Pirates” starts to watch a bit like Saw at sea. It’s not just the unbelievable volume of the torture Sebastian’s lover goes through, it’s the odd spe

Matelotage : Gay Marriage Among Pirates or Just a Business Partnership?

A pirate's gay marriage in disguise? 

 

 

Listen now:

AMM Audio Articles · Matelotage : Gay Marriage Among Pirates or Just a Business Partnership?

 

 

 

It should come as no surprise that a few colonial-era pirates were probably lgbtq+. All jokes aside about seamen and long months at sea, queer customs and same-sex relationships contain been around for as long as humans own paired up and fallen in love.

 

But what might come as a surprise is that many of these pirates were bound to each other in very public and widely accepted civil unions – called matelotages. 

 

Just like latest marriages and domestic partnerships, matelotage joined two men in affectionate, financial, and sometimes sexual partnerships. Once united in matelotage, the mens’ fortunes and futures were linked to the other, ensuring that if one pirate died, his partner would inherit his wealth and property. These pirates shared their incomes, fought alongside each other, and provided companionship and comfort in times of triumph or hardship. 

 

Relat

Behind the Video: Cosmo Jarvis' Gay Pirates

01/17/2011
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Today Cosmo Jarvis tells us the story behind the fresh video for "Gay Pirates" from the "Gay Pirates" EP which is arrange for release on January 23rd. Here you go!

Well the video initially began with a idea of mine that revolved around organism on a boat. A big ass square rigger. Now I had written a treatment for an extremely stern, very raw and literal visual presentation of events and characters in my song. The video was to be brutal in educating the audience of what really went down on that pirate ship. Not a single gimmick or anything ever able to be classified by anybody with an belief on gimmicks to be a gimmick, was to be allowed anywhere nearby this piece of drama telling the story of two gay pirates bound together by horror of the homophobic captain. I wanted all the events I described in the song to be there: the pirates sticking glass in the soles of the persecuted pirates' sandals and forcing him to wear them by threatening violence against his true passion, the fact that they are only truly at accord with each other as they are forced off the plank one after another by the entire crew of the pirate ship. These events